May 25th, 2018
Fourteenth Week in Perth, Australia:
This week went off to a great start! The first few days were incredibly relaxing, however, the following few days entailed enormous setbacks. I ended up partaking in a few activities that jeopardized my plans for the upcoming evenings, and ultimately ruined an incredible friendship. Both occurrences led me to question whether or not I will ever learn from my mistakes, break my detrimental habit, or even consider caring enough to try. After each of my daily assessments, I found myself circulating between stages of self-doubt, brief highs, and self-defeating thoughts. It almost felt like an endless battle between self-love and perpetual disapproval. Another part of me believes that having been away from my family for so long may also be a prime factor motivating my damaging habit. I suppose I will find out when I am back at home in the comfort of my nurturing family and the support of my close peers.
Does being abroad make you think any differently about what it means to be "an American"?
Surprisingly, yes! I never once considered being American as valuable until I arrived in Australia. As soon as someone realizes I’m from the states, their immediate reactions revolve around Trump, the legal drinking age, or even celebrities. However, a majority of the individuals I have met usually distinguish my nationality due to my foreign accent. At first, it felt so strange to hear people tell me about my accent because I considered them to be the ones with the accents! Now, distinguishing between Australian and American accents is almost like second nature for me. It’s going to be a huge culture shock coming home from Australia and realizing the diminished variation in cultural diversity in contrast to what I’ve recently become accustomed to while studying abroad.
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